Strategies For Forming New Habits In The Pursuit Of Joy, Happiness And A Greater Sense Of Achievement.
Do you believe that developing more helpful habits on a daily basis is a worthwhile pursuit?
Do you have active goals in key areas of your life, but find yourself still struggling?
This article will outline a number of strategies to help you have a breakthrough.
But before we delve into the strategies let’s look at the struggle part of the equation.
What is it that makes us struggle to take action toward regular good and uplifting habits and behaviours?
Uplifting habits such as regular:
exercise
meditation and self-reflection
writing out our goals
reading
skills development
time management
pursuing our creativity
and even the habit of consistency towards our goals through action
We all know that good and uplifting habits make us feel great and propel us forward towards our full potential and the life our dreams.
So, why don’t we do what is best for ourselves, all, or at least, most of the time?
The answer to this can be quite complicated and differs from person to person.
background
unresolved childhood hurt and trauma
self-worth
discipline and willpower
personality type
beliefs
preferences
All play a role in shaping what we do and don’t allow ourselves to be, do, have and experience.
Behind the struggle often there is fear, to really go for it, and develop and live our full potential. What if you go for it and you fail? The fear of disappointment, of failure, of rejection, the fear of commitment. Whatever the fear, it manifests in our behaviour, and keeps us stuck.
Staying stuck gets reflected in the habits we adopt on a daily basis.
As does potentially feeling (depending on your background and childhood) like we are fundamentally bad or flawed.
Unresolved Traumatic experiences can lead to carrying emotions and beliefs which are false, such as I’m at fault, I’m unloveable, I’m shameful, I’m unworthy and I’m powerlessness, just to name a few.
These false and stuck emotions and beliefs can be so cunning that we don’t even consciously know they are there.
Recently I got to uncover through a healing session with my friend, all of the guilt I still carried from my childhood, which I had no idea I was carrying.
Having had a violent, mentally-ill and alcoholic father, and throughout my childhood and adolescence, witnessing constant abuse, bullying, tyranny and violence towards my mother, left me feeling powerless and internalising that it was my job to protect my mum.
Because I could not protect and save her, her suffering was somehow my fault and therefore I was guilty.
How the residue of this plays out in the present, is by me subconsciously holding onto the belief that I deserve to be punished, still. Sabotaging some areas of my life, through unhelpful habits, is one way to continue to punish myself. This could relate to why I procrastinate, or cling to an income ceiling, or still play small in many areas of my career.
In the work of transforming our habits it can be helpful to revisit our past where the negative beliefs and excuses most likely originate.
Once we gain the awareness the next step is (self) forgiveness. Following on from that, is creating and embracing positive new beliefs and behaviours. This will reinforce the truth of who we are and the truth that it is possible to reach our full potential, to retrain our minds, heal our past, and experience and maintain fulfilment and joy.
Living the life of our dreams, guilt free, shame free, worry and debt free is a choice, and that choice is in our hands.
The quest to learn about ourselves can never be overlooked, is a long journey, and feeds into what we do and don’t allow ourselves to feel, be, do and have. Often times we don’t really know who we are because we have never prioritised the opportunity to investigate.
Avoiding investigating can lead to being pushed into a corner and being forced to change, unless we make a conscious choice. The dreaded wakeup call:
your partner leaves you
you have a health scare
running out of money
bankruptcy
Other life changes such as:
having a baby
or simply getting older, with time against you,
are great catalysts for taking on new habits and behaviours; great catalysts for putting effort into documenting and achieving your goals.
The tap on the shoulder comes in many forms, it is whether we choose to listen or to ignore it.
What do you need to change and improve right now?
What behaviours are not sustainable?
Staying stuck and small is easier than pushing through and living a life where we thrive.
Positive habits are a big part of feeling amazing, incredible and living the life of our dreams.
Arriving at that point where you are committed to improving your habits on a daily basis, because you know that unless you change for the better, your happiness, joy, freedom, health and legacy are at stake, is a good place to be.
Here are some Strategies For Forming New Habits In The Pursuit Of Happiness And Greater Fulfilment:
Clarity
Get clear and real with yourself. What actions do you need to start taking? What is your vision for your:
health
relationship
legacy and impact
love and romance
retirement
wealth
Document and commit what you see and dream of. Write it down and put today’s date on it.
Rearrange the list in order of priority. Pick one area that you want to focus on right now?
Write out at least five actions you need to take in the pursuit of making this vision come true. Number them in order of priority.
SWOT Analysis
What are your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats when it comes to taking the action steps? Understand what you will be up against when you start to take action. Formulate a plan for the obstacles ahead of time, so they do not derail you.
Decision and Timing
Commit to a start date. Diarise the actions and block out time.
Accountability
Get some accountability to help you with follow-through.
Community
Gather a group of people that support you in your quest. We think as we get older that we need to have it all figured out, that we can’t ask for help. Isolation is deadly when it comes to change.
Take it on as if your life depends on it. Even if you don’t fully succeed or if obstacles come up and you feel that whenever you take a step forward you end up two steps back, you will experience an energetic shift. Re-commit when it gets tough, or when you slip up and have a relapse.
If you are interested in getting some accountability around your new habits and behaviours my program The Momentum Habits Accountability Program comes with a 2-week free no obligation trial. Here is the link: http://bit.ly/2XjTaes